GANDHI KASTURBA: THE REAL SURYA-JYOTIKA FROM A DISTANT PAST

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Although I am frustrated and stressed out and could not even bare to open my eyes to write this, here I am writing this with incessant zeal to express my feelings after I read a book that costed just 50 bucks from a book expo. It is a Tamil book "Kasturba - Mahatmavin manaivi ezhuppum kaelvigal". With the title of the book itself we can understand that the content will not be that harsher yet touches upon the intention of this book to elucidate the perspectives of a bold yet moody women, Kasturba. 

Married at a very awkwardly young age, Kasturba was literally owned by Mr. Karamchand Gandhi as a result of the teachings of his community during those times, patriarchy though! One of the few things that could be admired from their relationship is that, Gandhi despite being very controlling intended to make Kasturba learn and unfortunately the event could not be trusted to be certified to be completely admirable as he was not ready to digest the outcome from educating her - that is he could not accept the fact that she questions him and is completely against or opposite to his views and always has a different perspective in any matters. When I attempt to analyse Kasturba's character, I find her to be very clear with the relationship with her husband. She chose to be pious and obedient and extremely loyal to him but was bold enough to stand for her decisions and relied over fairness than order. The book I read states that Gandhi was fearful for snakes and darkness while she was not. The real strength is not commanding someone but obliging to someone's commands and still acing the struggles at hand. 

My favorite instance from the book was - Karamchand Gandhi says Kastuba that she will soon lose her rights as his wife and when she exclaimed on it he told her that the South African President General Smuts had claimed Kasturba to be his mistress and not his legal wife as they did not get in line with the Christian customs to be recognised and hence asked her to join the silent protest along with other women and go to jail for it. He also added stories from literatures about women going to jail as an expression of strength and valor. Despite hearing all of it, she still remained worried and asked how will I sustain with jail food?

Gandhi replied by saying, "You can ask for fruits and have them". 

Now she grew angry and retaliated by saying, "You first told me to go to jail, and now you are asking me to die without proper food, what sort of a man are you?"

Gandhi: If you die in jail, then I will worship you like a God

Kasturba: Then definitely, I will rot in jail!

I mean, look at her other side of response too. 

Karamchand Gandhi in one of his books explain how cruel woman Kasturba was, but in all sides of the history that is still untold and not as popular as of this man's shows that she is more of a broad minded rational woman who's empathy and wit cannot be matched with Gandhi's such insecured, scared and selfish intellect. When one of Gandhi's son, Harilal wanted to go abroad and pursue his studies, Gandhi restricted him from going for it as his political plans did not favor his son's decision to follow his dreams but it was Kasturba, the feeble, uneducated and the so-called cruel woman who spoke for his free will to follow his dreams to study whatever he liked and marry whomever he wished to even with no education. 

I am pretty sure that her response to Gandhi - Sarala Devi's relationship and his desire to have her as his spiritual wife would also be funnier with a view of how she wanted to root the importance of free will in her son's life or it is still a riddle that if she would have known about it or whether her son who is aware of this incident had told his mother about it, we never know. History always never comes out as the way it is with people playing with their tongues.    

From this, we have to try to understand that the relationships we term to be ideal and is more desired for is always greener from the other shore. Those aligning towards patriarchy cannot still hold this part of Gandhi to back up with their actions of having a woman under them and declare it to be the most ideal and a desirable kind of relationship and make to be set as an example for those deprived of it. 

Ultimately, It is all in what you choose to show and not from what we see.

Idolizing someone or something will only stunt your growth and make you wobble and stops you from grounding. A good tree will stay grounded and tend to grow taller while also providing some shade. 

THIS BLOG HAS GOT NOTHING BUT UNDERSTANDINGS AND LESSONS OUT OF INSTANCES FROM GANDHI - KASTURBA'S LIFE. I HAVE ADDED SURYA-JYOTIKA IN THE TITLE ONLY TO METAPHORICALLY REFER TO THE IDEAL RELATIONSHIPS. 



 

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